Worst. Day.

You know those days that start off bad, and then continually get worse throughout the day? That was today. It was like ... having a cold wasn't enough. Everything else had to go wrong too. And now here I am, at the end of the day, wondering why the fuck I even got out of bed today. Facebook asked me earlier, 'what's on your mind?' and I responded with 'you don't want to know what's on my mind, Facebook. Trust me.'

I don't want to be an adult anymore.

I want someone else to handle things for me. I want them to tell me when to get up, what to do, where to go throughout my day. I want them to tell me what time to be home, and where to park the van. I want someone to instruct me on what needs to be done before I go to sleep - 'don't forget to brush your teeth', they'll say. That's what I want. Because then, there won't be any unexpected surprises. Nothing will jump out at me and say 'HA! Gotcha, Manda. What are you going to do now?' Because every detail of my life will be planned out for me. No unknowns.

If there was ever a horrible day to give me bad news ... today was it. Thanks a lot, Life, for making me realize that even when you're having a horrible day, there's always a way to make it just a little worse.

I always knew Fate was a cold-hearted whore.

HANNAH MONTANA IS ENDING.

I love how I'm locked out of my own effing laptop. Great.

You're still my muse.

You still piss me off.
You still make me laugh.
You still intrigue me.
You're still in my heart.
You still steal the show.
I still want your blue sweater.
I still want your approval.
You're still an ass.
I still remember your songs.
I still want a hug.
You still don't matter.
I still want to write with you.
I still haven't said my piece.
I'll still defend you.
I'm still hurt.
I still love your car.
You still clean up well.
I'm still your biggest fan.
I'm still your harshest critic.
I still lie to you.
You still think he's better.
I'm still happy.
You're still conceited.
You're still my muse.


It's almost like nothing's changed ...
But you'll still never read this.