i'm not emo. deal with it.

haha well i'm finally back with a decent blog ... so what am i up to lately? nothing much, really. i'm failing chemistry. big surprise.

but right NOW ... i'm looking for a new myspace layout. something that's different, you know? something that's ... well, me! which makes me think, you know? how is ANY layout "me" unless i design it myself? and seeing as i am not very good with the whole html thing ... i can't do that. so i have to settle for using someone else's interpretation of "me", or a similar interpretation as to one i would make.

that's bogus.

why do you have to have a layout at all? why can't it just be Facebook style (and no, i'm not paid to advertise Facebook. although at least they don't read my profile and target-advertise to me ...)? i don't get layouts. i very rarely keep the same one for much more than a month. it gets to me. if it was up to me, i'd change it daily! unfortunately (or thankfully, i'm not sure yet) that's not a very plausible idea, so i'll stick to changing it whenever the hell i feel like it. this has seemed to work pretty okay up until now.

but the thing with choosing a new myspace layout is that its always hard to pick one that's not going to get you retarded stereotypes. i mean, i had one once that had cute little skulls or x's or something on it, but i had found it under "emo layouts". now, i'm going to level with you: i'm not emo. emo is just a word, a word that society has totally twisted around to refer to someone in skinny jeans and tons of eyeliner. i wear eyeliner. lots of it. one of my friends commented the other day that i wouldn't have to spend so much on eyeliner if i "didn't put so damn much on". mad props to my girl for pointing out the obvious.

it should be, should be, apparent that i act like i act and think like i do because i feel like it. i have skinny jeans (not that i can wear them right now, my damn foots still to swollen from surgery). somedays i wear them. normally with my Live On Arrival tshirt and a totally great plaid bandana. sometimes even with *gasp* a spikey belt. but otherdays, i pull on my cream cashmere sweater over a pair of light wash straightleg jeans, throw on a little lip gloss and mascara and go.

but i digress. what i'm trying to emphasize is that myspace isn't about being "emo" or "punk" or "prep" or whatever the hell else you want to label people. its about connecting with people all around the world. that's what it was designed for. not ... who can get the most picture comments from their fake friends wanting comments back so they can look popular too.

i'm going to keep being genuine with people. i'll keep being honest with my friends. and yes. i call them friends. sure, i may not have met them all, but some of them are nicer to me and more understanding than half the people i see everyday. so you think that's lame? knock yourself out. this is me not giving a damn.

and you know what? while i'm on the subject of angsty ranting ... i just read Juan Mann's latest blog entry. you know, the Free Hugs guy? ya, his landlord is evicting him because too many people have been stopping by to encourage him. like ... jerkface much? come on people, the guy just wants to make a difference. why do visionaries like Juan always get burned the most?

that's also bogus.

so it's my humble opinion that people should stop focusing on their own little bubble and start thinking about how to make the world a better place. or at least shut the hell up. that would be useful for those of us who are trying. let's be honest people, how many of us have captioned a picture "i don't know if this one's so great" just so that people would respond "it's great! i love it. it's my favorite. can i own?" i know i have. and i know for damn sure i'm not alone.

and yes, i'm listening to christmas music. screw you too.